1. It’s Boring
He plays it safe. There’s nothing worse than kissing a guy who has the exact same style, head tilt, and stance every time you kiss. Don’t be too aggressive, but please, keep it interesting.
He forgets he has lips and constantly bumps your teeth with his teeth. Girl, be careful you don’t chip a tooth!
3. It’s a Spit Storm
His kisses are so extraordinarily wet that you feel like you have to wipe your mouth off after he pulls away. Don’t forget your big scarf to keep yourself dry.
4. He’s a Quickster
He has a ‘jack rabbit tongue’ that darts in and out of your mouth at lightening speed. He needs to remember that slow and steady wins the race. Right?
5. He’s a Peeper Creeper
This is when a guy never closes his eyes! Awwwwkward! At least he should show some passion, unless the kiss is so damn boring!
6. He Bites
This is the kind of guy who bites your lips…so hard you would think he’s eating an apple! Grrr..
7. You’ve Been Slimed
This is when you’re French kissing and his tongue just lies there like a slug. Enough said.
8. He’s Tongue’s Away!
This dude uses his tongue to lick around your mouth, instead of using his lips (and not in a good way).
9. He’s a garlic guy
He has bad breath…repeatedly! We’ll give him one “have bad breath and get out of a jail free card,” but if he’s a repeat offender, drop him a breath mint and be on your way.
10. The Unhappy Chappy
His lips are always super-chapped. How do you deal with that, when kissing is supposed to be soothing!
11. He Who Shall Not Be Named…
Well…..his tongue goes in quick and rotates like an airplane propeller. (Yes, it’s happened, but we don’t kiss and tell).
12. Say, Ah!
This tries to choke you with his tongue by pushing it way too far down your throat. You immediately have to make the decision to either finishing kissing, or breathe. We say breathe…
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